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The Birth Of Vulcans

 This is the true and untold story of how a planet very like ours became the world of the ultra-rationalist Vulcans. Perhaps there is something to be learnt in this story and maybe even implement it on our own planet. So, here it goes....

  Once upon a long long time ago (clever amalgamation of two of the most common starting lines in fairy tales, dont you think ?), there was a planet called XM234. It was inhabited by intelligent beings very similar to us. They had two hands, two legs and pretty much everything we have, including round ears. There were a multitude of religions on XM234, and each held their own belief to be supreme. There were wars and famines and floods and corruption and all manner of evil that we see in our own world. In this world, was born a boy named Zara Vulcan. He was peculiar in having slightly pointed ears, not too noticeable though. Just a small tapering which you could discern if you looked closely at his photo for a long time. He was also different than others, and had an IQ of 230. People came from all over the world to hail him as a 'miracle' of life. It annoyed him a lot. He knew he was no miracle. He was the product of random mutations which pushed him far ahead on the bell curve that governs our intelligence.

   As he grew up, he thought maybe his town was full of idiots, and the wide world out there would be rational. He traveled far and wide, discussing matters of science and rationality with everyone he met. He wanted to meet just one other person who was capable of the same thoughts as his, but he failed. At last, in a remote corner of the world, he came to the doors of this strange cult of 'science' and their society. He immediately fell in love with it. Everything here was systematic and deliberately planned and executed. People did not foolishly wait for prayers to be answered. Instead they looked for answers everywhere. He was hailed as a marvel there and for the first time in his life, he felt at home. He argued that this 'cult' should take over the world for its own benefit. But there were some among them who foretold grave danger for such a course of action. He was glad that at least there was some discussion on the matter as it should be, and nothing was held as too sacred to be left undiscussed.

   He was told that the majority of the XM234 world was 'religious' and they held all the power. To challenge them would be suicidal. And besides, there were many who thought that the world was 'funny' and more entertaining with such fools around. They told him to develop a sense of compassion for the brainless entertainers and let them be. Unfortunately, Zara Vulcan had thought all this and some more. He came to the conclusion that unless the religious fools go, there would not be any true progress. He went into deep meditation to figure out a way to solve the problem. He went very long without food or water and shaving and bathing. When he emerged, he had a pale look on his face, which many in the past had interpreted to be the look of enlightenment. Most of the religious prophets on his world had endured similar hardships before becoming famous for their propheteering.

   He decided to tell the whole world how wonderful the cult of science was, and why everyone should embrace it. But, wherever he went, he was looked upon with awe and respect, but nobody really believed him. And that was when he hit upon a brilliant idea. He realized that people on his world were like sheep. He had to be a clever shepherd for them, and lead them on. But where ? He thought a bit more about it and realized that these fools would never change. The only radical solution was complete elimination of all the fools. The only thing remaining should be the cult of science. But how to go about eliminating the majority of people on XM234?

   He went back to the cult and discussed his proposal. Most people were at first shocked that his plans were so destructive. But slowly, the anger they felt against the stupidity of the masses prevailed. The deal was ultimately clinched by Vulcan telling everyone that once all fools were gone, the whole of the planet's resources would be available to them to do science as they please. Not shackled by stupid religious notions, but a pure rational motivation for doing things. This convinced everyone to get in on the plan. It was the geologists who gave Vulcan the idea. One of them casually mentioned that the entire population would probably be not more than 0.1% of the magma flowing in their planet's core. Vulcan had then found his way.

   Painstakingly, he oversaw the building of a giant drill in a far away cave, completely in secret. Once completed, and when they reached the magma, he built a trap door at the mouth of the opening in the cave. Then, he went back to meditation and came out all pale and prophet like. He went back and with his best convincing face, he told everyone he found the 'gates to heaven'. He told every fool he met that his extraordinary high IQ helped him find it. And he went as far as to proclaim that perhaps their 'god' had made him so intelligent just for the purpose of finding the 'gates to heaven'. He thought there would be many doubts and he had thought of answers to a lot of them. But surprisingly, the fools took his words for granted. They flocked to the cave and he and his selected followers, kept opening the 'gates of heaven' in the cave to anyone and everyone who came. Most people only saw a flash of light and then the person just disappeared without a trace. That convinced them even more that it was indeed the gates to heaven. Billions came to the Vulcan cave to go to heaven. All of them burned up in the magma. The geologists had chosen a place which was least likely to erupt due to all the fools burning.

   Slowly, XM234 got rid of all the fools, who were only too happy to 'go to heaven'. The only belief system remaining on the planet was then the cult of science, and being rational, and being a good scientist, became a highly desired trait among the people. Since Zara Vulcan brought about this change, they started calling themselves Vulcanians, and later just Vulcans. Peculiarly, it seemed that high IQ and pointed ears had a genetic linkage, and so after many generations almost everyone had pointed ears. The Vulcans had started greeting each other with parting their fingers long ago. It symbolized the great chasm that separated them from the fools of their planet, and it also symbolized the chasm created by Vulcan to finally get rid of them. The hidden symbolism appealed to everyone, and they adopted it as their salute. And they lived rationally ever after....

This marks the end of the true story of the birth of Vulcans.

Comments

Smita said…
perfect descendant of HITLER !!!!!!
Smita said…
OMG perfect descendant of HITLER !!!!!